He told us everything was fine.
Who was that?
His pediatrician... last week.
We saw him 10 days ago.
Nine.
Nine days ago.
He examined Paul and told us everything was fine.
He said Paul was fit and healthy.
He was probably right.
But now my son is dead.
Yes.
My son is dead, and you're telling me
the guy who examined him and said he was fine...
you're telling me this guy was probably right?
It's probable... indeed very probable...
that Paul was a victim of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.
It's the most mysterious cause of death.
The most mysterious, the most arbitrary...
and the most cruel.
You're angry and that's normal.
Let's leave my anger out of this.
Someone didn't do his job and an innocent child is dead.
That's the reality.
There is no mystery.
An inexplicable death?
I don't know what that means.
It doesn't exist.
It's just a way to cover up someone's incompetence.
I see it every day.
If you would like, there is a procedure...
Perhaps the only one that allows us to rule out
the most common hypothesis.
Out of the question.
You can take some time and think about it.
No. No autopsy.
Out of the question.
I forbid you to touch my son.
Why some are victims, why others are not is...
"Dear Jennifer,
"I'd like to talk to you about these long nights when I'm alone.
"About the nighttime crossings...
"desert crossings filled with ghosts.
"And about these hearts I hear
"beating deep inside all these rooms...
"deep inside all these bodies,
"these hearts that want to go on beating and don't give up.
"They say life is worth living, and they want more of it.
My heart hasn't given up either".
I know it's hard for you.
I know what all this has cost you,
what a stay in a hospital costs...
And I know that with your night job you...
No, Nathan.
It's kind of you.
I'd just like to help. It's not much,
but at least you wouldn't have to worry about money.
That's all. I can do that, at least.
No.
"Here, they all believe in God.
"But me,
"I believe in this beating heart of mine
"and this pulsing in my veins.
"I believe in this force inside of me.
"If you come to see me, I'll tell you about my life here,
"about those times the fear rises up and lifts you so high...
"it makes you feel dizzy.
"Hopelessness too.
"You go through these moments
"and think you're gone, and you tremble.
"But sometimes...
"yes, sometimes... you discover within yourself
"an unsuspected strength.
"You'll see all this strength...
"you will... if you come to see me.
"I know I'm gonna die soon.
"And I know I'm here to learn something.
"When I've learned what I've come to learn,
"I'll go. I know that.
"But in my head,
I can't imagine that life comes to an end".
Hi, Nathan, this is Anna.
Am I bothering you?
No, not at all.
How are you?
I, um...
I've been thinking about your offer
and I think I'm going to accept it.
Good. I'll call my bank right away.
- Okay? - Yes.
I didn't understand you, angel.
What did you say?
There was a storm last night.
Really?
Yeah.
- Well, what was it like? - I saw lightning.
Honey, I can't stay on the phone too long.
- Daddy? - Yes.
I don't want to go on the plane by myself.
Why, honey? What's wrong?
I want you to come and get me.
You won't be alone.
There will be somebody to keep you company.
That's the way we've always done it.
- But I'm scared. - You're scared?
What are you scared of, sweetie? There's no reason...
I'm scared of taking the plane by myself.
I'm scared of storms.
- I'm scared of lightning. - Do It.
- Daddy? - Yes?
I want you to come and get me.
Sir, want to come with me please?
- What for? - Sir, please.
- Get the fuck away from me, okay? - Honey, I have to go.
- Honey. Honey. I'll call you back. - Leave me alone, all right?
- Not yet. - Sir, you need to come with me...
Or what?
Asshole, what are you going to do now? What now?
All you get down!
Anna, can you hear me?
Anna.
- Are you okay? - Call someone.
Call someone. Anna.
Hello?
It's Anna.
I know.
Listen, where are you?
I'll call come and pick you up.
- No. - Tell me where you are... please.
How much time do I have left?
Tell me when.
Nathan, the time you have left is your own.
Tell me how long. Just tell me.
I don't know.
Don't give me that.
You knew for the others.
So tell me when.
All I can do is help.
Nathan, tell me where you are.
May I come in?
I went to see them...
the Rachevskys.
I wanted to tell them
she died because of me.
If I hadn't taken her to that bank,
she'd still be here with us.
Her son would still have a mother.
But I didn't even have that much courage.
Do you remember when you called me
from the hospital that day?
You said you'd saved her? You were wrong.
Today you say you killed her, you're still wrong.
With or without you, Anna would've died.
In her father's place, or a couple of hours later
falling down a flight of stairs.
No one knows.
- No one can know. - I don't want to die.
- Nathan... - I don't want to die.
I'll say it again.
No one has power over the hour of death.
Hello?
It's me.
I want you to come and see me.
I want you to come right away... both of you.
What's going on?
It's nothing.
You must come... both of you.
- Nathan, what's the matter? - Nothing.
- You can tell me. - Yeah, sure.
I'll be okay.
I just wanted to see you.
I'm sorry, I'll call you later.
You gonna be okay?
Yeah.
Are you sure?
Yeah, sure.
I'm sorry.
Paul was dead and...
I just screamed at her...
as if she was to blame.
You never talked to her about it afterwards?
No.
She was right to leave.
They're both happy. That's good.
She always had a mind of her own.
Yes. Always.
And I love it.
I remember a little girl
when I was an intern.
She came to the hospital everyday
to visit her best friend.
She'd very nearly drowned in a lake.
And her friend had run off to get help
and there was an accident.
They'd only just met on vacation.
They didn't even speak the same language.
Yet they were inseparable.
There was such a bond between them.
A strong bond.
And she came every day.
Every day.
She'd hold your hand.
She had made up her mind
that she wasn't going to leave your side.
And she didn't.
Why are you telling me this now?
Why only now?
I've been here.
I haven't hidden anything from you.
I've been right here in front of you the whole time.
All you had to do was open your eyes.
It was you who questioned me when I came out of the coma.
You were the only one who believed me.
Yes.
Kay, where are you?
Rachel on machine: Nathan, it's Rachel.
Everybody here is looking for you.
Where are you?
I left six messages on your cell phone.
- Will you call me? - Kay?
Where are you? What's wrong with me?
First of all, don't panic.
There's a clinic at the northeast corner
of 44th and Lexington.
They'll give you a shot of glucagon.
- Lexington and what? - 44th.
It's okay, Nathan.
I'm here.
You're asking me where we go after we die?
Nathan, knowing whether there is an afterlife
is not the point.
The important thing is being alive before you die.
Today, now. Fully alive.
The wonder of life is in the here and now.
We always find out too late.
I've got to go get my daughter,
and I'm frightened for her.
So you're going to come with me.
You're going to come with us.
This white light, you haven't seen it on yourself yet, right?
- No. - Good.
That means if you're on the plane with us
nothing will happen.
I don't want to put Tracey in danger.
Is it him or her?
This light, what's it like exactly?
I told you.
It's like a white halo shining from the person.
And you see it all the time?
No, you only see it once, and then...
but that's not what's important.
I know, I know.
So who is he anyway?
- A doctor. - You work together?
Not really. It's kinda complicated.
He's a friend of yours?
Why is he here?
Just traveling with me.
- I didn't want to travel alone. - Like Tracey.
Yeah. Like Tracey, yeah.
It's happening tonight?
Maybe.
I hope so.
You can never know in advance.
You know why I came? The real reason.
You came because you promised her you would.
You came because you love your daughter.
- Don't you? - Of course I do.
But there's something else.
Naturally.
Look, Nathan,
I have a life here
and I'm trying to build something solid with Tracey...
Wait, listen!
I think I know what you're trying to tell me
and I think that we can avoid this sort of...
Unpleasantness?
You know exactly what I mean.
I want you to come with me.
I want the three of us to go back to New York.
I want you to come home.
Avoid just that sort of thing.
Tracey, don't look.
You go back alone. I'm staying here.
I want to stay here.
- With Tracey? - Yes, with Tracey, yes.
- You still need me. - No.
I don't know.
I'm staying, that's all.
Is there something I should know?
Something you haven't told me?
I'm going to miss my plane.
Honey, do you know how to use it?
Huh? Press here. Yes, that's it.
Good.
- Daddy? - Yes.
The people we saw a while ago...
- Yes? - The ones in the accident.
- Yes? - The ones who died.
- Yes. - Will they have crosses too?
I don't know. Maybe.
But they're not buried under them, right?
Who?
Oh, no.
But Paul, he's buried under one, right?
Yes, honey.
Listen, honey,
if anything ever happens to me,
if I get to feel sick or, I don't know...
what do you do?
- I call Mommy. - You call Mommy.
Good, right.
And who else, if Mommy isn't there?
If you have to call for help, what do you do?
- I scream. - You scream?
Honey, I'm serious. What do you do?
I cry? I know, relax.
I press here.
You already showed me.
Okay.
Honey, you remember when...
when Paul died?
Do you remember?
Well, when he died...
I found a garden slug.
I remember.
I remember you asked a lot of questions.
Lots and lots of questions.
Like what?
You asked us where he was.
We told you, "Paul is in heaven.
In heaven with the angels".
And you asked us if you could go see him.
You wanted to go see him.
And I don't know if we always said the right thing.
- It isn't true? - What isn't true?
That Paul's in heaven?
He could be.
Maybe.
But to tell you the truth,
nobody really knows. Nobody can know.
- It's something that... - I know.
You do?
When we die they put us into the ground...
and slugs eat us, of course,
and then we disappear.
And then we don't exist any more.
Nobody can be sure of that either.
But you know, I believe one thing.
- Want me to tell you? - Mm-hmm.
I think just because we die
doesn't mean we don't exist anymore.
Maybe we exist someplace else.
And you know why I think that?
When you see a boat vanish...
have you ever seen a boat vanish on the horizon?
When a boat disappears in the distance,
it vanishes,
but does that mean it doesn't exist anymore?
No.
Right.
I believe dying is like that.
It's like a boat vanishing on the horizon.
Just because you can't see it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
- Can we talk? - Why did you come back?
We didn't want to fly.
Tracey and I were too scared to take the plane.
Besides, I'm in no hurry to get home.
So what do you plan to do?
Here? I don't know.
Hang out.
Spend some time with Tracey.
Go for walks.
You could maybe point out some places to go.
- Tracey told me you two... - Places to go?
Nathan, what's the matter with you?
- Nothing. - What do you mean, nothing?
You call me in the middle of the night as if...
I don't know.
Then you show up two days early with this strange guy,
and you come out with these remarks.
Now you're talking about going for walks?
What's going on?
You have troubles at the firm, is that it?
No, not really.
Then what? Are you sick?
No, not that I'm aware of.
Not that you're aware of?
No.
Just a little hypoglycemia.
When does it happen?
Two hours from now, maybe sooner.
We had ice cream last night,
and we talked about Paul.
On the road we saw some crosses,
and afterwards she wanted to...
does she talk to you about it?
Not so much these days.
But is she all right?
The last time on the phone when I called,
- she was already asleep... - She wasn't asleep.
She wasn't asleep?
- No. - Can't you take a break?
Five minutes.
Nathan, in one hour this flower will be dead.
It blooms one night a year, just the once,
- and I still have... - Yes, I know that, but...
sorry.
When we went home to New York...
do you remember the first thing you did?
The first.
You called the office.
You wanted to know if anyone had called.
We'd just buried Paul,
and you disappeared into your work.
You shut yourself off in your anger.
But Tracey and I were still there.
We were alive.
I know you felt guilty.
I know that you blamed yourself
because you heard him cry
and you didn't go check on him.
- He called me. - No.
Paul cried and he went back to sleep,
and even if...
He called me, but I didn't go to him.
Nathan, Paul didn't call anyone.
Paul's dead.
I've accepted that and so has Tracey.
She's accepted it in her own little way.
And now you... you need to accept it too.
- I'm ready. - You need to stop...
I don't know.
I don't know, Nathan.
I don't know what to tell you.
I'm ready. I came back to tell you.
And if anything ever happens to me...
Why do you say that?
I wanted you to know that I've changed.
I know a river not far from here.
If you want, I could show you how to get there.
Yeah.
I'd like that.
A pretty river.
Right.
- Not very far? - No.
Forgive me.
Hi, this is Rachel calling from Nathan's office.
I'm sorry to bother you, but...
he's not at home and hasn't been by the office in several days.
We can't reach him on his cell phone either.
We're worried and thought maybe you'd heard from him.
Could you please call us if you've got any news?
They're looking for you.
Yes, I know.
"Someone once told me,
"'The wonder of life is in the here and now. '
"I'm going to die soon.
"And yet, I'm no longer dominated by fear.
"Life is full of riches...
"the gestures, the laughter,
"the joy we shared.
"I remember it all.
"I remember your breathing too,
"when you slept in the car.
"Mommy's face when she saw us.
"We did a lot of things together.
Lots and lots of things".
"I've learned a lot.
I've met some wonderful people".
Hi, I... I'm Jennifer.
"Cherish your happiness.
"Savor it at every instant.
"And above all,
"don't get upset if you think of me.
"Don't be sad.
"And one day, if you want to talk to me...
"if you really want to...
"pick a spot you like.
"A spot where we used to go together.
"You'll be able to talk to me... you'll see.
"Because I'll be there.
"And remember,
"don't be ashamed to tell people you care about
"that you love them.
I love you both very much".
Did you sleep well?
Yes.
Want me to make you a fresh pot?
No, it's okay.
I need to see you. You've got to get out here.
I need to see you now, understand?
- I'm here. - Take the first flight...
I'm here. I'm here with you.
What do you mean here?
On the road to the airport... the Crossroads Motel.
I'm here.
I'll wait for you here.
You lied to me from the start.
No.
You said it was me.
You said so.
You said I was the one who was going to die.
So what did I see? Tell me.
I was the one who was supposed to die.
It was supposed to be me!
You said so!
No.
Nathan?
Tracey, have you seen daddy?
No.
I'm a Messenger, right?
Yes.
And my wife is going to die.
Yes.
Why didn't you tell me
when you came to see me the first time
instead of being so mysterious.
The swan's song and all that bullshit.
You wouldn't have believed me.
You never would have believed me.
I was trying to prepare you.
Prepare me for what?
You're a Messenger.
A teacher of life.
But to be a teacher of life
you have to remember your own mortality.
- You have to. - But why does she have to die?
Why her?
All Messengers lose the person closest to them.
That's the price... the price of grace.
I paid the same price.
But in time,
you'll know that you were there until the very end.
Through the very end.
That's the price of becoming a Messenger.
But I never asked for this.
Nobody ever gave me a choice.
You made your choice, Nathan.
You made your choice when you decided to come back
after you had died on that road.
And you came back.
And now you know why.
What brought you back?
A face.
Whose face?
Claire's face.
She was afraid.
She needed me.
Where were you?
I got lost.
We were waiting for you.
I got lost.
We thought that you'd left us...
that you'd...
- We were worried. - I know.
But don't be scared.
I'm here now.
I'll never leave you again.
I'm here.